Tuesday, 29 January 2013

Nag Nag Nag - Repeat - Or Not?


Children are awesome (most of the time)!  Hubby and I know we are blessed (most of the time)!  Sometimes our kids unwittingly teach US something.  But the trick is remembering to listen.
So our last post shared our intention of a family meeting and introducing a Mission for our family.  For those wondering - it went so well!  Coconut, Peach and Pickle were so receptive and excited about our plan - that we were actually taken aback.  We expected some push back or disinterest in the poster.  But they were EXCITED!  They took turns reading it, and gave examples, without us really asking of HOW they could be better, kinder, and more helpful.  They were especially happy about being able to redirect each other and Hubby and I if we needed reminding of the family rules. 
The other item that was an "aha" moment for us is when we introduced the "Chore Chart."  An hour before our meeting Pickle was nagging me about what chores she was excited to sign up for.  During the meeting, the kids - seriously - were arguing about who gets to do what chore.  They even offered to sign up for more than one daily chore - which boggles my mind!  Normally repetition (a.k.a. nagging) is required to get them to accomplish tasks.  But for some reason - this whole approach has generated interest and commitment in our children.  The big question: WHY?
I think I may know the answer. They felt involved.  I think they saw their own personal value...and they saw how they could use it to benefit the group.  So when they had to choose 1 daily chore each, and 1 weekly chore each - they became part of the TEAM.  Not just on the team - but an integral PART of it.  Shame on us for not letting them see their potential.  Point noted.  Changes made.
So the game play is like this.  Rather than NAG NAG NAG - REPEAT...they can check the chart and get it done. 
I love it.  My kids are pretty great...and sometimes giving them the opportunity to show it builds their esteem.  I have to remember to do that more.  To let them know their input is valuable and appreciated.

I can't believe it but...my little punkins are growing and contributing!

Happy Aha Moments!
Kathy Pettit

Sunday, 20 January 2013

Mission (Im)Possible?

Every now and then I have check the map and make sure we are headed in the right direction.  (Now, I am "mapically" challenged, but you'll get where I'm headed.)  I feel a little bit like we have veered off the intended path and are headed in the wrong direction.

The "slinging sisters" (and by slinging I mean fists and insults) and the "handy" man (and by handy I mean a little too hands on!) are starting to let their emotions get the better of them.  I'm not paid to referee, nor do I find the job very appealing!  So - Hubby and I have come up with Pledge or Mission Statement for our family.

Families are like a small business.  Money is exchanged, goods and services are changed hands, people get tired of their job....and when they get tired they stop caring.  Like all good businesses, having a mission statement, or a plan is vital to its success.  We felt it was time to come up with a Family Mission Statement to strengthen our resolve to be better parents and raise kind, generous individuals who will be engaging contributors to the future.  So, unbeknownst to them, our next family meeting will introduce this concept to them.  We will hang it on every floor in our house.  When we feel the referee whistle come out, we will guide all parties involved over to the poster and get them to read it out loud.  We are hoping that the messages hit home, and they can see beyond their minute grievances and stop the anger.  We will encourage them to use it to redirect Hubby and I, if they feel we are not living up the set out expectations.  (That should be interesting!) 

So Pickle, Peach and Coconut better be prepared for the mission ahead of them.  However, encouraging them to commit everything they do with kindness in mind - cannot be bad.  Wish us luck in this venture - and think about committing to paper your own family mission statement.

I can't believe it but...I am hoping those words make us better, kinder individuals!

Happy Mission Planning,

Kathy Pettit

Monday, 14 January 2013

The Tales of a Tale

Writing can be hard work!  Sometimes the creativity gets sucked out of your very being when you   think too hard.  That's why I tend to avoid thinking really hard...it's just easier that way.  Mindless roboting is WAY more creative.

But, when you have a tale to tell you have to think and plan ahead.  I have finally started the second draft of my novel (which, in case you were interested I started several years ago and dropped like a hot potato while juggling diapers, bottles, and otherwise time-occupying tasks!).  I say second draft...but to be perfectly frank, I don't yet have an ending in my first draft - but I do have a hefty portion completed.  You see all the ideas are kind of percolating in my head....dripping through the grinds of my brain...finishing with a fine cup of coffee great ending.  I feel a bit embarrassed that I am admitting, publicly (as only a few know my fanciful dream of publishing a book) this little "secret."  The thing is, it's on my bucket list.  If it goes nowhere - I can still say "I did it, I wrote a book."  If it goes somewhere, I can pretend I am very accomplished, carry around a Sharpie so at any time I can make a fans' day by applying said Sharpie to various body parts of the book.  But it's hard.  I am sure the second draft will be grammatically challenged.  Luckily my hubby is the best editor on the planet (according to moi)!  Before I can apply Sharpie sigs to any book, he'll first take his red pen and tsk-tsk me into grammatically perfect form.

So my fans (sorry, a little carried away with the fame and fortune thing) friends, if you want to contribute - I think it would be kind of neat to allow my readers to come up with an idea or name (it is a fantasy/fiction novel) every now and then.  Please add your suggestions to the "comments" section and I may include them in my novel-to-be - and of course credit you in my long list of people I need to thank in my life! 

I guess I am sharing because I feel like I have now made a commitment, cemented the end result.  Publicly (although, there is a handy-dandy delete post button just in case!).

The very first bit I am looking for suggestions on is:  The name of the boat for the "bad" royalty.  It's fiction/fantasy so let your imagination run wild!

Happy reading!

I can't believe it but...my project is public knowledge.  Gulp! (Sorry that wasn't nerves, it was a swig of wine!)

Kathy Pettit

Monday, 7 January 2013

The Self Conscious Extrovert

Incidentally - NOT me dancing

It is time to freely admit it.  A time to share with everyone the painful truth that exists in my life.  It's not easy, a few gulps of air (and maybe wine) to bare it all.  But I have to lay the burden down.

I can't dance.  

There it is.  Just like that.  The truth.  For those that are kind and give me the benefit of the doubt - please don't.  You're not doing me any favours.  You see, my dance moves (or lack there of) are awkwardly stuck in the 90's.  Nobody really "raises the roof" anymore, or pulls off a killer "running man" - or even a perfect 10 "Cabbage Patch."  Even if they did - does it look good?  Wait!  Don't answer that!  Truth hurts.  The only real dance move I could do with ease was when Kris Kross made me "Jump Jump."  The Humpty Dance posed some challenges, as did BBD, Rob Bass, Young MC...I have to face it - I am Rhythmically Challenged. 

Luckily,  I have a good friend that suffers from the same affliction (or so she says, but she may be one of those fakers that lie to try and make you feel better ;D - kidding BL!), so I am not alone in my inability to move to the rhythm (because rhythm is a dancer, it's a sole companion, you can feel it everywhere...sorry couldn't resist!!)on a dance floor.  So, between the two of us we came up with a money-making venture to help us poor moms hit the dance floor.  Someone should start up a dance group for beginner mom dancers with no skills - and teach us HOW to dance some basic go-to moves that keep us looking current and confident on the dance floor.  I am certain we could find a group of self-conscious moms that would love to never do the "worm" again!  (Kidding, I was never co-ordinated enough to pull that off!)  

So there it is.  Don't think any less of me for my discomfort of all things dance.  Instead, rock out to the 90's with me...or, if it's easier, pretend you don't know me on the dance floor.  I'll understand.

I can't believe it but...the truth is out there.

Happy Grooving,

Kathy Pettit